Good Friday invites us to stand in that place where Jesus stood.
In Isaiah 50:5-6 we hear of this place from the very mouth of the suffering servant. And I have not rebelled, have not turned back. I gave my back to those who beat me, my cheeks to those who plucked my beard; my face I did not shield from buffets and spitting.
In the Garden of Eden, through pride, we rebelled, and we turned back from God’s will for us, but Jesus does neither. In his passion and in the fullness of his humanity, Jesus stands in that place where we failed. Jesus obeys the will of the Father. He neither rebels nor does he turn back.
How do we respond to insult, mockery, abuse, disregard and violence? Is not our first inclination to respond in kind? If you insult me, then get ready for my insult back! If you hurt me then I will hurt you even more! We see this sad logic at play throughout human history and throughout our world today. But Jesus does not buy into this sad logic. Jesus does not rebel, he does not go against the will of the Father. Jesus does not disobey God’s law; he does not respond to violence directed towards him in whatever form with violence in return.
Nor does Jesus turn back. Again, in the fullness of his humanity, he remains in the Father’s will even as he is betrayed, insulted, mocked, scourged, slandered, tossed between Pilate and Herod and disregarded by so many even as he hung on the cross for us. Jesus remained, he took all the violence and spite that was thrown at him. Could any of us have done this? Would our inclination not have been to fall back, to get away from such pain?
This is the place where Jesus stood, neither rebelling nor falling back. Jesus stood fully in this place where we failed and he did what we could not. Jesus obeyed, trusting in the love of the Father.
Good Friday invites us to stand in this place where Jesus stood. It is only in grace that we can do this but that grace has been given now in Christ.
And a deeper truth, when (in grace) we are able to stand in that place where Jesus stood – neither rebelling nor falling back when violence is directed at us – we will find that Jesus stands there with us. That very place becomes a place of encounter with our Lord where we know his companionship, his friendship and his love. It becomes a place of blessing rather than a curse.
Good Friday invites us to stand in that place where Jesus stood.
In his recent homily (found on Word on Fire) for the third Sunday of Lent, Bishop Robert Barron offers succinct reflections on each of the Ten Commandments. He rightly (I believe) connects the breaking of the Eighth Commandment, “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor” with the sin of calumny. Calumny, the willful spreading of false statements about another person in order to damage their reputation, is rife within our society and given safe haven, it seems, especially on social media. Bishop Barron, both in his insight as a theologian and pioneer in ministry via social media, is in a unique vantage point to note this besetting sin of our age and to call it out. Which he does.
The point of reflection for this post is how are we to handle calumny when it comes our way? Which, more than likely, it will at some point or even points within our lives. I offer four thoughts for consideration.
First, be grateful. Yes, it’s a paradox but we have a God who delights in paradox and frankly, life if full of paradoxes. The silver lining in the dark cloud of calumny is that you quickly learn who your true friends are. “A faithful friend is a sturdy shelter: he that has found one has found a treasure” (Sirach 6:14). Isn’t it best to know where the sturdy shelter is during a time of turmoil than be left out in the cold by false friends who turn away from you just because of something they have heard or something that they suppose to be true about you which is not? Calumny can actually clear the weeds of false friendship out of one’s life which makes the true, faithful friend all the more apparent and valued. Being receptive to the lies of calumny also demonstrates a profound lack of intelligence. Judging another person because of what others say before even knowing the person oneself or even choosing to believe lies about another person rather than one’s own experience of the person is intellectual sloth, plain and simple. Who wants a stupid friend? There is a silver lining.
Second, be civil. If calumny is a besetting sin of our time, if there are victims of calumny then that means there are perpetrators of calumny. I call them “wormtongues” after the pathetic character in J.R.R. Tolkien’s “Lord of the Rings”. (Grima Wormtongue is the court official who whispered lies into the ears of King Theoden in order to steal away life and keep the king paralyzed in doubt.) Wormtongues lack true moral authority and courage (think of internet trolls) and they think that the way to build themselves up is to tear other persons down. Don’t sink to the level or actions of wormtongues. Don’t be naïve to them or their machinations, know them for who they are, but be civil in the face of their incivility. Choosing to respond civilly even in the face of hostility and lies is an act of moral courage and strength. Be civil.
Be faithful. Here we encounter a deep mystery of our faith. Not only do we have a God who is Truth and who calls us to live in truth in our relationships and to not bear false witness but we have a God who also fully endured the scourge of calumny himself. Jesus, throughout his ministry, had to endure the whispers of lies and doubts about who he was and his true motives. “He casts out demons by the ruler of the demons.” (Mt. 9:34) This whispering became a consistent and hellish roar directed straight at our Lord throughout his passion from the agony in the garden and the running away of the disciples to the mocking of the soldiers during the scourging to the crowd calling for his death to insults even as he hung on the cross, “Come down from the cross, if you are the Son of God!” (Mt. 27:40). Jesus knows full well the pain of calumny.
Here is a spiritual exercise for those times when one is experiencing the pain of calumny: pray over a Gospel passage where Jesus is enduring the pain of calumny, place yourself in the scene and just be there as faithful friend for our Lord. We cannot take the pain away, but Jesus so values our presence and our friendship. Just be there in that moment as friend for Jesus. Graces will come from that prayer.
Finally, be open to leaving by knowing your fixed point. Throughout his ministry, Jesus moved from town to town, sometimes because he knew that forces were aligning against him and lies were being told but that his hour had not yet come. Throughout all this movement, Jesus always remained rooted in his relationship with the Father. His relationship with the Father was his fixed point. When we know our fixed point everything else becomes secondary. As Christians, our fixed point is that each of us is a beloved child of God with a dignity and worth. If this is not being respected, if lies are being told, then we have the freedom to move on from a particular group and its relationships, from a specific social setting and even from a certain location. Knowing our fixed point brings a freedom that the sin of calumny cannot overcome.
Calumny is a sin and it is a besetting sin of our time. It is a sin that will probably come our way in one form or another but it can be endured with dignity and grace and we can know that our Lord, who himself endured the pain of calumny, walks with us in friendship and that this too shall pass.
Finally, if you are a wormtongue, if you are a perpetrator of calumny, stop it. You are breaking the Eighth Commandment which is a sin before God for which you will be held accountable. You are tearing your brother and sister down; you are helping to tear our society apart and you are demeaning yourself in the process and that is pathetic. Don’t be a wormtongue. There is no dignity in being a wormtongue.